Bad Advice, Big Loss

A new king asked for three days to decide. In that time he heard two kinds of advice, and the one he picked was followed by his kingdom splitting in two. This is the story of Rehoboam, from First Kings, chapter twelve.

Rehoboam went to Shechem, because all Israel had come there to make him king. Jeroboam, the son of Nebat, came too. He had been in Egypt, where he'd fled from King Solomon, and the people had sent for him.

Here was their request. “Your father made our yoke difficult. Now therefore make the hard service of your father, and his heavy yoke which he put on us, lighter, and we will serve you.” A lighter load, and in return, they said they would serve him.

The king said, “Depart for three days, then come back to me.” The people left. Then Rehoboam called in the old men, who had stood before his father Solomon while he was alive. “What counsel do you give me to answer these people?”

Their answer was simple. “If you will be a servant to this people today, and will serve them, and answer them with good words, then they will be your servants forever.” Serve them now, and keep them for good.

But Rehoboam abandoned the counsel of the old men. The text doesn't tell us why. It only tells us who he turned to next: the young men who had grown up with him, who stood before him.

He asked them the same question, and they gave a very different answer. They told him to say, “My little finger is thicker than my father’s waist.” It sounds like a boast of strength.

And then the rest. “Now my father burdened you with a heavy yoke, but I will add to your yoke. My father chastised you with whips, but I will chastise you with scorpions.” That was their advice: heavier, not lighter, from the young men he grew up with.

On the third day, Jeroboam and all the people came back, as the king had asked. The king answered them roughly. He abandoned the counsel of the old men, and spoke the words of the young men: “My father made your yoke heavy, but I will add to your yoke. My father chastised you with whips, but I will chastise you with scorpions.”

The text says the king didn't listen to the people. It also says this was “a thing brought about from Yahweh, that he might establish his word.”

When Israel saw the king didn't listen, they answered him. “What portion have we in David? We don’t have an inheritance in the son of Jesse. To your tents, Israel! Now see to your own house, David.” So Israel departed to their tents.

The children of Israel who lived in the cities of Judah were ruled by Rehoboam. He sent Adoram, who was over the forced labor, and all Israel stoned him to death. The king hurried to his chariot to flee to Jerusalem.

Then all Israel heard that Jeroboam had returned. They sent and called him to the congregation, and made him king over all Israel. Only the tribe of Judah stayed with David's house. A kingdom split in two, after the king didn't listen to the people, which the text says was brought about from Yahweh.

In our Stand Firm series, here's what hits me about this story. Rehoboam didn't lack advice. He had two voices, and he picked. We do that every day, with the group chat, the feed, the people at lunch, the playlist in our ears. Every voice we let in is giving us advice about who to be.

Notice which advice sounded strong. “I will add to your yoke” sounds powerful. Serving sounds like losing. But strong and wise aren't the same thing. A voice isn't right because it sounds confident, or because it's the one closest to you.

So before you follow a voice, ask where it leads. Does this sound like Jesus? Does it make me more kind, or more cruel? Does it match what God's Word says? Give God's Word the first word, and let other voices answer to it.

Decide your lines ahead of time, with God, before the pressure shows up. Then you won't be making it up on the spot in the group chat or the hallway. And find a few friends who walk with him, people who tell you the truth and pray with you. The world isn't all bad. But the people closest to you shape where you end up.

If you feel alone in this, God sees you and hasn't left you. Talk to a parent, a pastor, or another adult you trust, and find a church family to walk with. Standing firm doesn't mean being harsh. Stay humble, stay kind, and let people see Jesus in how you hold your ground.

Scripture: One who walks with wise men grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.

One line from Proverbs says it better than I can: “One who walks with wise men grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.” So whose voice gets the most say in your life right now? Take that to God this week. Let's pray. Lord Jesus, thank you that your Word is wise and true. Help us choose voices that lead us toward you, and give us courage to stand firm with kindness. Amen. Follow Rooted for more stories. Walk in him. Stay rooted.